Feb 24

Always get a negative pregnancy test? Have you ever seen two lines on a pee stick? Here are some helpful ways to achieve your BFP.

  1. Draw on the second line yourself. Both marker and pen will work. Then show your husband the exciting news!
  2. Cross your eyes until your sight becomes blurry and you actually see a second line.
  3. Get a pregnant lady to pee on your stick.
  4. Sneak into a pregnant lady’s house and stick your pregnancy test in her leftover urine on the toilet seat.
  5. Urinate following your HCG trigger shot (the hormone in the shot will actually produce two lines) and this will make you very happy.
  6. Close your eyes when looking at the results and just assume it’s positive.
  7. Stick the pee test in a glass of apple juice. The defective pregnancy stick could mean you are pregnant.
  8. Pee on two sticks for two lines.
  9. Ask a blind person to read you the results.
  10. Buy your pregnancy test from an online store called “yourpregnancytestwillbepositive.com.”
  11. Try to buy the Octomom’s old pregnancy test off eBay.
  12. Or just look through the trash in your fertility clinic’s bathroom until you find a positive test. Note: you might have to wait weeks for this.

Congratulations, you are now pregnant!

photo: here

11 Responses to “#800 Helpful tips to achieve a positive pregnancy result”

  1. says:

    This is the best ever! Does the fact that I have actually considered doing #5 make me a total loser? At least that way, I would know my body was capable of getting a positive test. ;o)

    Love, love, love it!!!!!

  2. Lisa says:

    I’ve thought of POAS after a trigger shot myself. Thought it would be the only way I would ever get a positive stick test. Should have done it.

  3. Amanda says:

    Or you can pee on an OPK, then open your HPT test and switch out the strips so the positive OPK strip is now in your HPT window…. kwim? no one would be the wiser. Put it on your refrigerator as a goal to achieve just like people trying to lose weight put pics of skinny superstars on the fridge. Motivation. or maybe a better place would be in a frame in the bedroom…

  4. says:

    LOL – I have done #5 ans I’m sure done #2 by making myself cross-eyed staring at sticks.

    :)

  5. says:

    Oh my golly, I wish I had proof-read that before I posted it!

    LOL – I have done #5 AND I’m sure I’VE done #2 by making myself cross-eyed staring at sticks.

    :D

  6. Dana says:

    Ohh I’m so guilty of both #2 and #5!

  7. Dee says:

    Ive done #1…

  8. Laura says:

    Yup, I’m guilty of #5, just last week, in fact. I just wanted to make sure the tests actually worked, yeah, that’s it.

  9. Nixf01 says:

    You mean #2 and #5 aren’t normal behaviour??? Oh..

    And #6 seems perfectly rational to me… ;)

    xxx

  10. says:

    OK…so, I just found your blog again. I actually did #5 after my trigger. I told my husband that it would be the first double line I had ever seen….and hopefully not the last. Yes, I am a bit crazy. But aren’t all infertiles?????

  11. says:

    I’ve done #3. When my sister was preggo, I had her pee on a stick for me. And pretended for that short second that it was mine.

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