Hey Facebook Friend, although we’ve enjoyed the thousands of pictures of your growing belly, your ultrasound photos and your babies first poopie diapers, for the love of God, PLEASE STOP!!!!!!
You may politely comment on your fertile friend’s daily status updates and maternity photos, but here are some things you would rather say instead…
FB Friend, I may have commented that your belly looks great but I really meant you look like a fatty!
FB Friend, your 3D ultrasound is just plain scary!
FB Friend, stop posting photos of your babies. They aren’t that cute. At least you won’t have to worry about future boyfriends!
FB Friend, you are right. Your ankles do look fat!
FB Friend, I don’t need daily updates about your pregnancy. Would you like daily updates about my transvaginal appointments?
FB Friend, it’s unfortunate that your baby looks so much like your husband.
FB Friend, my frozen embryos are cuter than your fetus.
FB Friend, I’ll listen to you talk about your mucus plug if you’ll listen to me discuss my cervical mucus.
Hey Facebook Friend, we love you but we are sensitive and vulnerable but strong women who need a little bit of extra support and hugs right now. And we also know that oneday, we might post our belly and kid pictures too, just with a little more sensitivity.
This is great. I have a post on the exact same topic from a few weeks ago. My favorite are the earlier ultrasounds–ie pictures taken from a vagina. And people turn these into their profile pictures. I mean really, do you want a picture taken from your wife’s vagina to be the way you announce you’re having your tenth child?
BA-HAHAHAHA!
As someone who is continually bombarded by pregnant/parenting friends’ posts on FB, I could really relate to this one.
A tip for my fellow IFers who use FB: use the “hide” feature for friends who just.can’t.stop.talking about their pregnancies or kids. It has saved my sanity–and probably some friendships–on more than one occasion.
So true! My sister in law had her ultrasound picture up as her profile FOREVER! I was so sick of seeing it I couldn’t even look at her status updates.
Seriously, the “hide” feature saves my sanity!
I also hate it when people use photos of their kids as their avatar — so annoying . . . .
“FB Friend, my frozen embryos are cuter than your fetus.”….Ahahahahahaha. If only.
So True! HAHAHAHA
I could really live without seeing any of those 3D/4D ultrasound pictures. They are SO frickin’ creepy!
ha ha – just yesterday I was saying to my husband in regards to a new born baby photo on facebook “too bad he looks like his father….” LOL
i JUST “hid” someone this morning on FB because i am getting sick of her posting “if you think your daughter is the best thing in this world….” and “encouraging” everyone to vote for her for cutest kid in whatever contest she’s enrolled her in this week (i think there have been at least 4 “contests” in the past month)….her daughter (6 months) IS cute but for the sake of my sanity i really just had to hide her!!!!!
oh yeah, and she’s one of my BEST friends!!! HA!
HA! I don’t even HAVE a fb account FOR THIS VERY REASON!! But, this “FB Friend, you are right. Your ankles do look fat! ” is HILARIOUS!!! Hahahahahahaha
FB Friend, my frozen embryos are cuter than your fetus. Almost fell off my chair laughing. A few weeks ago I was going for a transvaginal ultrasound on the same day as my sister in law was having her 2nd trimester ultrasound. I showed off my “future babies” when she showed me her pictures.
I *do* post daily updates of my transvaginal appointments. Is that bad? Today I live tweeted my IUI. My husband just rolls his eyes and doesn’t say anything. Bless his heart!
I really need to correct this remembered saving. It eats “r”s.
This is just lame if you ask me. I just think this is plain mean and dumb….and that’s coming from someone who’s been TTC for over 5 years and still has no babies. Sure, these are just jokes, and I appreciate the humor, but life is beautiful in all forms…and sure it’s hard to see everyone else pregnant, and posting belly pictures….It kills me sometimes too…but to say the ultrasound and baby are ugly, and the mother is fat? That’s just immature. To joke like this just shows how much you are hurting, and shows how insensitive you are to those who are pregnant. Tell me that none of you would flip the world upside down just to be pregnant and in their shoes! Tell me you won’t be posting fetus pictures and belly pictures on Facebook when you get pregnant! I know I will! And then what, you’ll be making fun of me too? This whole posting is immature if you ask me. Grow up!
Alice- I think your comments are lame and immature. This post is very funny because that’s how we really feel! We often just bite our tongues and no one really understands infertility. This amazing website tells how we really feel and the author is very sensitive to infertility. Grow up too!
Alice- If you can’t learn to laugh and be positive about infertility, why are you commenting on this website? It pokes fun at infertility.
I LOVE this post! ALICE- I think infertility has killed your sense of humor.
Is it strange that I giggle when people get mad about this website? I learned to “laugh” (or smile) about infertility when I first starting reading this blog and laughing just helps.
Thanks for the giggle, Alice!
Oh Alice, I can see why you’d be offended at “FB Friend, you are right. Your ankles do look fat!” That is not funny at all (trying to hide a giggle).
These are great!
Alice – Just shut up.
Love it!
Alice, you’re wrong. I’m finally pregnant after years of IF and I can guarantee once we formally announce our pregnanct next week, I will NOT be posting ultrasounds images, belly shots, or a plethora of baby pictures. I will post SOME baby pictures, but I don’t know who on Facebook is dealing with IF now, and I refuse to be one of those people who make their lives miserable on a daily or even weekly basis. If there’s one thing IF should teach you, it is sensitivity.
AWESOME! I just now found this BLOG and I love it. I have recently discovered the satisfaction of the “HIDE” button.
With 200+ friends I have plenty of people to keep up with without getting slammed with belly shots and ultrasound pics. gah.
13 weeks and still not even 1 announcement on FB. It was very difficult to see all the weekly preggo pics and ultrasound photos on there when we were frustrated with our own inability to procreate. Of course, I was happy for my friends and family, but it ached inside everytime and I can’t risk doing that to others. This website was my saving grace that gave me ‘understanding friends’ even though we’ve never met – I wasn’t alone and my feelings were normal. I’m not sure what to do; I’ve thought about starting a blog so my family 9 hrs away can keep updated without me risking being another ‘of those FB’ers’, but haven’t decided yet. I’m sorry, Alice, that this is the point you’ve found yourself in and I hope that soon you can find people you can relate to.
lol!
Too true – the hide button is all good!
And Alice…. this is the one place where we can be honest about how we are coping and have a good laugh. Something has to balance out the brace face we all put up when offered useless advice or the insensitive comments that we all get regularly. And seriously, it is one thing to joke about being horrible, it is quite another to actually do it.
Perhaps you need to read through some more posts, you will soon realise it is all in good fun and we are not horrible people. Hey, you may even get a smile out of a couple of them!
Not sure why people are attacking Alice. Everyone should be respected when they post their opinions, whether someone agrees with them or not.
And Holly, saying “Alice – Just shut up” is obviously rude. Will insulting her bring you a baby faster? Probably not.
Rachel, very well said. And Kate I agree with you. I will be soo excited when I finally get pregnant and will want to announce it to the world, but I’ll show some restraint in that area. I have friends who do nothing but post complaints about their pregnancies and/or newborns, and it just sickens me to read these over and over again.
My vow to myself is this: when I am finally pregnant and able to announce it- then I will do so with extreme honesty. I will be honest about my infertility, and not try to hide it one bit. I think some people hide it, and this puts shame in infertility, when there is NO SHAME. So yes, I will announce it, but I will be totally honest about the hard road my husband and I have walked to get there.
And as far as this post- HILARIOUS. I think all our life, we will all have an immature side…. but the mature side stops us from making the comments that pop into our brain. Here is a place to let it out and not offend. It also helps us to normalize our feelings. I don’t know how many times I have walked around wondering if my mean/childish thoughts were normal. I know they are- and this post just made me laugh.
And I just have to say that sometimes…. FACEBOOK SUCKS!
Best wishes to all of you!
Sarah
Envy and bitterness eats away at everyone over time, it’s starting to show ladies. This site is hit and miss for spot on feelings, both negative and positive spins on how IF goes.
So true!!
Keep up the great writing.
Every single day another pg woman “surfaces” in my life that isn’t me
I am SO over it!! On the one hand I feel terrible that sometimes it is just so hard to be happy for friends and family, but on the other I wish they would all just shut up already!!!
Thanks for the post! I love it!
Everyone should have a right to their opinions, blah blah blah, but Alice really missed the boat on this one. It is soooo hard to watch others in their pregnancy bliss when it is not happening for you. My best friend is having a baby by C-section on Wednesday… I had to be sensitive to the fact that she was bummed about not being able to deliver vaginally. She had to be sensitive to the fact that I haven’t been able to conceive. I wouldn’t in a million years say to her, “HEY! lucky for you, you can have a baby at all, unlike me, your infertile friend!!!” Though, I cannot say that the thought didn’t cross my mind.
FB mommies don’t have to shut up, but I certainly will hide their butts so I don’t have to look at all that happiness when I am hormonal. If (when) I get preggers, I will spare my friends out of respect for myself and how I felt when I saw their growing bellies, ultrasound pictures, etc. You never know what your FB friend is going through. Let’s not get so personal on a social networking website, how about that?
I found this article from Facebook (someone posted it). After checking your article, I of course clicked Like and also shared it.
Gday people… I am brand new here but I can not wait to begin having/getting several great conversations along with you all! I just thought i would introduce myself to you all so howdy!
This post is so true. I feel like all of my friends are pregnant and ALL of them have pictures of their growing bellies taking thenselves with with a bathroom mirror as their FB pic.
Yup… bitter because I am jealous. Eff them! Eff them big time! Eff eff eff!
lolol
This is just fantastic, a great website for all of us to wind down and at the end of the day just have a good chuckle.
Alice: Okay, insensitive to those who are pregnant? You lost me at the ‘they’re PREGNANT’ part! And if they have had fertility and have finally become pregnant, they will probably laugh with us because they don’t care if their ankles are fat! They’re pregnant!
So what we are doing is bad? How many of us are going to post this to a pregnant friend? Aaand how many pregnant friends post their pictures and baby love letters to us? At least we have the sensitivity to just hide them, not bombard them with our side of the story to make them feel bad…..
This is SO DUMB!!! I never saw anything as stupid as this website… Get a life.. if you can’t be happy for them then just delete them.. honestly, I bet your friends have no IDEA that someone they call a FRIEND would feel that way about them.. its like saying, Hey im not gonna post pic of me in my new shirt cause there are thousands of people who cant afford it. REALL? The joys of being pregnant makes you wanna scream it out to the world.. its something every mother would feel.. if not thats up to them..but seriously get a life assholes.
To the person who calls themselves “Happy”
To make a comment like that means you have no idea what it means to experience infertility. We would never say anything like this aloud so this is a site that says exactly what we are thinking. This blog makes fun of infertility and pregnant people. You have NO idea what it feels like in our shoes.
Happy- Your insensitive comment says that you are not infertile at all. You have no idea how this feels. If you want to know how it feels, read every single blog post and maybe you would get it. I doubt it though. And we are happy for our pregnant friends and I would never say anything like this to their faces. It is just really hard to see everyone have babies and get pregnant when we have been trying for years. Why would you even comment here????
I DO know how it feels.. I am infertile
I am unable to get pregnant as well, but for real. If you don’t want to see what someone puts as their FB status or when they upload pictures, block them or defriend them if it bugs you this badly. If everyone of FB were forced to consider how every post ‘might’ hurt somebody’s feelings the damn website would not exist.
Hey Tom, maybe you can’t get pregnant because your name is Tom… Just saying…
I have no idea whaT it feels like to be infertile, but I think it’s sad that you all alienate those of us who are not; as if it is our fault. And it doesn’t really matter whether you actually say these things or not. These thoughts are incredibly mean spirited. I can understand those kind of posts might bother you, but chances are the person posting them has no idea. I have lived through terrible ordeals and it never once occurred to me to insult anyone just because they hadn’t lived through the same things as I.
Wow! you bitches who have a problem with seeing women’s unborn chidren are probably just single & miserable .. probably fat too!
Lindsey,
I think your immaturity and ignorance is showing, you might want to work on that.