You have a secret infertile fantasy. You fantasize that you will somehow get pregnant naturally. Naturally meaning the good ole fashion “bing, bang, boom” way. You really believe that could happen even if you have no fallopian tubes, your eggs keep breaking, and his two-headed sperms keep crashing into one another.
But you keep fantasizing that one day, it will just happen naturally. You will get pregnant on your own. This fantasy often occurs right before a fertility treatment. Sure, you might be having your 80th IVF cycle or your 40th IUI, but you could still get pregnant naturally. Right? You have one month to wait before your next IUI or IVF and you keep hoping that you will magically just get pregnant.
Perhaps your period is a day late and you think to yourself, “Wow. Maybe we did get pregnant naturally.” You feel a bit of excitement thinking that you no longer have to tell your children they were created by a turkey baster and hatched in a test tube. You might not have to tell your children that daddy had low sperm motility and mommy had ovulation problems. You even allow yourself to imagine telling your parents and your in-laws the news…”Mom and dad. Gilda and Marshal. We are pregnant and we did it on our own by having (animal-like) sexual intercourse.” You also fantasize that you won’t have to pay thousands of dollars on fertility treatments and you could actually afford to send your children to school. But then your period arrives. And your fantasy that you got pregnant naturally this month disappears faster than the tub of ice cream you are about to eat.
Maybe getting pregnant “naturally” means having your little miracle anyway you can and fighting for them with all your strength and all your love. And that actually sounds pretty darn natural.
Yes! Exactly!
But Cindy’s sister-in-law’s cousin’s neighbor got pregnant naturally after 8 years of TTC! Although these stories annoy us, we somehow believe them. Oh and the visual of two-headed sperm bumping into each other as they race toward two broken eaggs had me LMAO!!
After all, who said getting pregnant was easy?
http://whycantigetpregnantinfo.com/
ba ha ha ha. That was me this month!! I think I will leave this to my circle of fertile “but I just got off the pill” friends”
Omg, recently I have been saying that I wonder what getting pregnant by having sex must be like…
“And your fantasy that you got pregnant naturally this month disappears faster than the tub of ice cream you are about to eat.”
Note to self: buy tub of double-chocolate fudge brownie ice cream on p+12.
Awesome!
My DH has Azoos – NO sperm (nada) – and yet I continue to harbor this bizarre expectation that maybe just maybe a miracle will change that and I’ll turn up pregnant just like you say! What the hell am I thinking? I even took a pg test last month – AFTER i started my period – thinking that maybe just maybe I was one of those ladies who still ‘gets’ her period when she is pregnant.
Maybe just maybe I have been watching way too much “i didn’t know I was pregnant”, you think?
I am amazed with every post that you are able to nail exactly what I am thinking, but too embarrassed to admit. haha
Wow. So I really do fit in here! I had the speech all prepared, too….
“it was an accident. We weren’t even trying. I was resting between cycles and I guess I finally relaxed enough to concieve!”
But as soon as I started to rehearse the lines in my head, here comes my period. Clearly, there will be no accidents, we’ll try and try again, and I will never be able to just relax!
I say it all the time, but I love love love this blog!
Oh god!! my thoughts exactly! ..I’m still praying though
we just went through this last week – hoping and praying and making deals with God that if we got pregnant, we’d take the refund we’d get back from the clinic and do something good with it….alas, we started injections on saturday for our first IVF cycle and just like that, there goes the refund
Oh yes, I get my hopes up every time the periode is late. That have been every cycle after the faild ICSI this spring, they keep on getting longer and longer each time but the periode shows up as always.
It doesn´t make it better that I know couples who did it on their own after a number of faild IVFs, or when started treatment for the next IVF/ICSI..
I´m still begging for miracles aka. good behaving endo, better spermcounts and motility
Well, you know, that will definitely happen right before/after you “just adopt”, of course! Because that happened for my mom’s cousin’s friend’s hairdresser’s aunt! If you “just adopt,” or “just relax,” or “just give it time”… As if my uterus is the friggin Field of Dreams!
[WORDPRESS HASHCASH] The poster sent us ‘0 which is not a hashcash value.
Ouch. You got me there. Starting IVF in September – still two months time to pray for a miracle. Hope has never been higher.
It’s not totally unlikely in our case because our diagnosis is “idiopathic sterility” (for me, this always sounds like “to idiotic to make a baby”). But somewhere deep inside I just know that all these injections are waiting for me not so far away …
hope always seeps its way in every. single. time.
damn fantasy! thankfully there are endless tubs of ice cream.
Our journey has begun!… secretly though
If I’ve left you this message, you’re a follower of my original blog ~OR~ just someone I’ve happened upon while sending out these invites and that I would LOVE for to come along for the ride! Though I won’t be revealing who I am just yet – until we’re TO and THROUGH the first trimester! Just getting the word out about our new site – further explanation of all the secrecy and what we’re about on my first post. I’d love for you to stop by.
Exciting things going on around here!
http://www.definitelymaybebaby.com
~ the {secret} *Maybe* Baby Mama
Yes I agree with the feeling!!! I am broken after an ectopic pregnancy, having my tube removed and being told that im high risk ectopic……why oh why do i have to be broken inside?? does anyone have enough tape to fix me?
I literally just laughed out loud at reading this!! After a ttc break, I’m waiting for dear AF to show up and on CD46. I’ve already peed on not one but two HPT thinking, “imagine if it just happened like that?” Needless to say, both tests had one little line so I’m procrastinating calling the doctor to take Provera yet again. sigh.
At least your post but a really bright spot in my day!
I think that to receive the mortgage loans from banks you ought to have a firm reason. However, one time I’ve received a bank loan, just because I wanted to buy a bike.