Everyone was sitting around the table, drinking tea and enjoying pie.
Except you.
The infertile who had her pregdar on high alert. You were staring at your cousin’s stomach because she was wearing a baggy sweater. Her belly looks a little big. Is she pregnant? But she isn’t getting married until the summer. That’s not fair. She can’t get pregnant yet. Right?
You tried not to stare at her belly and pretended to look at the floor. Maybe it’s just fat. Is she drinking decaf tea?
You stare at her belly for the rest of the afternoon. Is she or isn’t she? Lady, if you’re going to announce a pregnancy, just do it at the beginning of the meal so I can cry in the bathroom and call my therapist on speed dial. Then, I’ll come back to the table with a fake smile and eat the rest of this pie.
Thanks cousin Bessy and congratulations.
This actually happened to me this weekend at a family birthday celebration. My husband’s cousin who is slim and trim always is dressed up in her best for occasions, except this time she wearing a old baggy sweat shirt and jeans! She didn’t make any announcements though.
I have never been wrong about this yet. Um, that I can remember. But I am sure I am going to get myself in trouble eventually
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Love it! You should make this into one of those desk calendars!!!
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So, I have actually done the opposite. I have been completely clueless, went to a family event and then went home – not suspecting that someone was prego. Then I hear a few days later by a text that a family member is pregnant – she texted us to let me know. I’m thinking back to what she was wearing. Really, I’m thinking you have GOT to be kidding me.
Oh yeah. This is me. At a Christmas party, I was absolutely convinced a cousin was pregnant because she was not drinking any wine. I was so sure. But…to date..there has been no announcement. Of course, I’m sure that I just jinxed myself on this…
Thankfully, my cousins who are of child bearing age aren’t married or decided no children. The only ones I have to worry about are my SILs..in which there will be no holding back. Again I’m thankful they live on opposite sides of the US with me in the Midwest. Thus I hardly ever have to see my nieces and nephew; it’s much too difficult to be around them for an extended period of time.
I was sitting down on the train and saw the big round belly of someone standing near me. I rolled my eyes, thought bitter thoughts, and then looked up to see that it was in fact just an old man with a beer belly. Pregdar WAY over the top that day.